Falling back into peices

For a year she begged me
put that knife down
and so i did, she is my bestest friend
theres no way id say no to her
for a year that knife was hidden
from my eyes to see,from my skin to feel
me and my bestest friend
we dont see eachother anymore
we dont talk like we use to
my life has changed once again
for the worse, for the bad, for that knife
i thought of those days
my friend sheèd sit infront of me
and cry tears of her pain
tears for me, for me to see
and i saw through her eyes
what i was to her, i was a world, i was a somebody
now its up to me to finish the rest i guess
for once i have to be stronge
i have to say no, to that blade when it comes
but how, all iv ever done was say yes
if your reading this my friend
please please dont
turn your eyes and look away
you dont need to see
how iv become behind your back
i called her yesterday
she couldnt talk
but she asked how iv been these days
i told her good im doing well
if only she knew that was a lie
that was the first lie iv ever told
she probally thinks about me
that maybe once im well
but she doesnt know
that behind her back
iv changed
iv found
that knife
and that is
what iv become
a
cutter
once again