Wow...
I admire your metaphors, as always. This piece is utterly brilliant, remarkable. I'm sure that I already told you that you write the most effective and captivating love poetry that I've ever read, endlessly original and refreshing.
Your choice of words here is superb through the whole piece and the descriptions took me to completely different world. I like the introduction to the poem, that first stanza truly made me wonder where this will go. Overall, this is mind-blowing.
The third stanza is my favorite one, it is truly powerful and vivid.