I liked the message i will check out more of your work. thanks

The only thing I'd have to edit about this would be the usual punctuation and capitalization.

When I read your work it reminds me of a preacher preaching because of all the exclamation marks. :) I liked the poem. It was interesting and I liked the constancy of when you at the beginning of each stanza. I'd give this poem a five.

Jim all i can say here is this poem truly makes me want to see your face,in person.now that would be interesting.Beautifully written my man.