Midnight Musings ((of the bitter kind))

When did this lamp's glow
become so yellow and so harsh?
since when can i hear out my window
the tired wheels of the tired cars?

I can see dark black curtains
draped over my window, draped over my mind,
obscuring silent realities,
realities of the bitter kind

I no longer have an idea,
I don't know what to do
when everybody's lied to me,
and nothing seems to be true

Maybe I started off too strong,
I knew I'd fall again,
too many people now know my problem,
one too many know my sin

I wonder if they'll read this,
if they can see the black curtains too
and I wonder if in an hour they'll lie to me
1 A.M. and nothing seems true