I've Got A Little Too Much Captain In Me

by Anthony Duvalle   May 19, 2008


You have him
I have her
He makes you laugh
She makes my tongue slur

You love him
I really need her
He cant stop kissing you
I cant stop the sweet liquor

You'll keep him
Ill drink myself away
Ill beg for your help
Keep telling yourself it's okay

0


Did You Like This Poem?

Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by H E Losey

    Good write! I really enjoyed the rhyme scheme you used in the first two stanzas and would have liked to see it continue into the last, not that what you did is bad just what I would have liked. I think your metre is right on. I would insert appostrophies in the "I'll"s, but I'm picky.
    A nice story of losing the girl for the bottle.

  • 16 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    Very short and to the point. I did not find myself wading through a sea of words to catch the emotion in this whiskey lala-by
    very well written

  • 16 years ago

    by Sheep

    Very good and very true, i like your style, short ans sweet. very to the point.