Running and Skipping

"Running and skipping for days on end,
Then I come across you, a friend,"
`These first two lines were great. It started a great rhyme.

"As time moves on, I find that I don't want to be your friend,"
`I think you changed your verb tense here. I think moves should be moved..?
`Oh, and then "I find that I don't want to be your friend.." -Sets off the flow a lot because you repeated the word friend.. I lost the rhyme in the third line of the poem, I didn't really like that.. cause now It's going to be hard to pick it up again, well hopefully not.

"I want something more,
I want to be yours,
Yours to hold and adore,"
`This is sweet and beautiful. I would have however made the lines longer though.. they aren't as long as your first stanza is.. and that is another factor for a rocky flow. But this is a very sweet desire that you wish & hope for.

"But you won't let me go that far,
You won't let me be your little shinning star,
Just the girl who embraces the glorious sounds of your guitar,"
`This is sad. But, you worded it nicely I suppose. The rhyme is back.. but I can't say that the flow is that extremely good or anything. The length of your lines are kinda in a variety whcih sets it off for me.

"We are with each other most of the time,
When I see you I can't help myself but endlessly rhyme,
You know that you make my heart chime,
But to you, loving me is like committing a crime,"
`This stanza was worded wonderfully, probably the best stanza yet. The lines were about the same length, the flow and rhyme were good. I especially loved the last line of this stanza... :]

"I do not know why you feel this way,
Whatever the reason I will never push you away,
I will always adore the games we play,"
`Aww. This is awesome. Because although this person doesn't feel the same, you`'ll always love them no matter what and always adore them.

"You are the reason I pray night and day,
I will love you, everyday,

But for now, I am running and skipping with you for days on end"
`Again you switch from short lines to long lines.. that's not good because then the flow is really rocky :\

Overall, a sweet poem. But the flow was off pretty much throughout most of the poem.. Make sure to make all your lines the same length, that should help quite a bit. 4/5.

That was a great poem the only thing that threw me off was the very ending. but i love the emotion you give, and how you expressed how he made you felt i could feel everything in the poem.

AMAZING POEM..and WHO told u r not good at it..if u don't mine me asking? 5/5 great job

That's really cute i can totally relate to this poem, and girl this happens to the best of us.

I really liked that 4 stanza it really brought out the emotion of wanting someone you can't have

Good Job ",
5/5

I found this poem abit too cute for me
(no offense)

the rhymes are good but as mentioned before ^ ^
i feel they are a little forced.. maybe because you couldnt think of what to write =S

i get it all the time

"You are the reason I pray night and day,
I will love you, everyday,"
^
very good lines!!!
my fav part =]

as i said before keep it up!!

4/5 from me =]