Putting others first

Why is it some have more courage than others ? ,
the courage to take a chance for themselfs.
Then there are people like me ,
always thinking of the feelings of everyone else.

I have always put others first ,
and putting my own happiness on hold.
To scared to take chances in case it upsets anyone ,
telling myself it would be wrong to be so cold.

I have been like it all my life ,
at school the bullies they picked on me.
Never did I have the courage to fight back ,
only thing I fought back was the tears so they could not see.

Then when I left school friends would only ring ,
because I had a car and would take them anywhere.
Never did I dare to say no to them ,
even though about me they really did not care.

Now as adult I am a mum and a partner ,
putting my kids first I shall always do.
But what my partner says goes and I simply do has I'm told ,
Because I'm too scared to fight back and do what I want to do.

Just for once in my life I wish I could ,
take a chance and do something for me.
But thats never going to happen ,
because putting others first will always be.