Bloodshot Eyes (Never to Be)

Lies,
Cries,
So many tries,
All through these two bloodshot eyes..

How many stitches,
How many glitches,
So many dreams,
Too many wishes

It occurs to me that I no longer have the capacity to wonder. Something flew away without me ever realizing it...

Fights,
Nights,
Not enough lights,
As I strip myself of my absurd rights..

I see hope, just a sliver,
And I'm a taker, not a giver..
But my hands they quiver, so cold,
It's just a dream, I'm in a river..

I'm stuck deep in this river,
As my hands shake and quiver;
My lips turn blue,
My mind still sheathed 'round you..

Waiting for something new,
Wishing for something old,
Waiting for love from you,
Wishing I had her to hold..

She is not warm anymore, she is in the earth, and I was so close... Does that not occur when you visit their grave? Can't you feel their spirit calling to you? You're a mere 6 feet from them, yet you can not see, touch, nor hear them.

Do you not beat the ground, trying to punish the earth for it's crimes? Do you not lose your mind and wail like you've fallen into a boiling river? You're so close, feet away, so close, so far.. Will the earth never give her back to me? I wish I didn't know the answer.. Denial is celestial, don't you think?

It only hurts more when you found another who doesn't want you...
I love her, she said she loves me..

but that we are never to be