Interesting piece, I like the topic, I've never read a poem like this on the site before. You created good flow from the beginning to the end and you have really nice choice of words within every stanza. |
Very good, but I must say a little |
I do enjoy how you started it with Suddenly it seems my mind went blank. It instantly hits the reader with emotion and suspense and makes the rest of the write that much better. If I were you though I'd change attempt to explain to cannot explain. I think it helps the meter and flow seem smoother. But its just an idea. My favorite line had to be the "A philosopher has a scheme |
by East Poetry
You absolutely know I love this poem. We all have our own unique mind. placed inside of our matter. Our bodies may be the alpha and the omega. As you see your self standing on earth you are alpha. The smallest thing in existence, But perhaps your body and all of its particles makes up a HUGE part of the night sky. Maybe a part you and I cant even see. you Are here and there at the same time. Your Omega. The largest thing of your existence. And so your body is. Yet its all inside of him. There shall be no God Before me. Only after me(or in me) Read my poem Infinite existence. |