Numb Minded

My eyes swell with years.
I'm not entirely sure why.
Could it be the random thoughts?
Is that the culprit of my cry?

I consider many questions.
Hoping for the right dream.
It is then that I will know.
What my life's supposed to be.

Is it a blessing, or a nightmare?
My life for someone else.
That "someone" being my sister.
Was it the future that was dealt?

I can't release the feelings.
They're mutual, they cling.
They cling tightly to my heart.
And they're not gonna leave.

It's simply impossible for me.
To describe how I see.
When I can't even find the words.
And I can't let myself be free.

Despite my natural thinking.
I know what to expect.
From anyone or anything.
I'll just have to accept.