I had you, I lost you...
you were there, then were not,
vanishing in my moment of utter collapse like an illusion, a wisp of smoke carried by a stormy cloud.
My heart broke.... and my mind suffocated, the darkness surrounding me swallowed me whole, but you were gone.....
lost in the crowd melting away from sight.....
I'm no longer alive, I no longer feel the hatred that burnt my veins, my pumping pulse is fading and I am fading with it...
I can no longer stand my ground and fight, hiding in the mist and they still come for me...
I no longer want this begotten illusion -- the numbness is overpowered by a feeling of pure revolution towards myself...
This is not for me, I no longer belong in this corrupt world, this world where the feelings are numb, the heart doesn't exist and the fear of tomorrow drives me into the shadows......
I can no longer stay, in frozen motion, waiting for the pain, the clarity.... anything
good-bye my love...
sweet dark corrupt dreams forever
I don't deserve you, to expect you to come, to respond is foolish of me... I don't deserve this...
I no longer wish to be here, i'm not going to stay, to wait in the waiting room of life.........
your touch burns, a feeling, any feeling is miraculous.... your scent still lingers tingling the essence of my being......
but I don't deserve anything, from you, from life, from the world.....
goodbye my love......
you WILL live forever... always in the memories of those that love you, I will fade into the hellish fires that I deserve, the pain that awaits and then bliss, bliss through death.....
sweet corruptive dreams my love......
I'm ready to leave now.... ready for the pain, ready for the bliss that i so desire, a feeling of completion.... completion through death, bliss through death, life through death... better then any life before