Stay or Go

I can not sleep, I can not dream
I can not be the person i want to be
So far i have held up, but something is changing
The path i took is rearranging.
For a person not to sleep; is to say that they are sick
But in my case, i do not know what the problem is
Yes i know i had trouble sleeping before
because of a boy, but i thought i won that war.
It seems very doubtful that he is the cause
for me not sleeping three weeks straight at all.
My parents think i sleep every night, but i am
just wearing a mask to cover up the lies
They see me with my eyes closed, but i am just faking
it, cause i do not want their lives to be screwed up
because of me.
Inside i feel alone and scared, like nobody is
there; Yet i am surrounded by people who truly care
I never liked sleeping and waking up at a certain time,
but all i want right now is to dream, and to let my
thoughts combine.
I know you do not know the answer to my problem
But you are to one i talk to so i thought you
should know.
I have not slept in weeks and it is tearing me down
Please tell me how to fix this, cause i do not know how.
I was going to go to my family and friends, but it
seems like nobody understands, I am not sure i even do.
I am wearing a maskt o cover up my pain
All i ask is for somebody to come save me before my life ends.
But i am not sue anybody would even know if i was to stay or if i was to go!