Comments : I'll Speak These Words and Whisper With My Eyes

  • 16 years ago

    by Amaranthine

    Thats not mediocre. =] great job.
    I luv how u flood out your feelings. beautful emotions, even if it can be sad.

  • 16 years ago

    by Blissful

    I adored the title. It really captured my attention and had me wanting to read more.

    1st Stanza.
    Your opening line was captivating. I loved the use of the word "drench" because it was so powerful and fit in perfectly with what you were saying. I could feel longing you still possess for this person because you expressed it so beautifully making it easy to relate.

    "But holding on just suffocates me more than letting go"
    ^Oh my I could just relate with this so nicely. I loved the use of the word "suffocate" because it gives me an image of not being able to survive holding on to a love that has soon departed. Beautifully heartbreaking.

    2nd Stanza.
    Powerful last two lines in this stanza. Very deep and full of meaning. I know the feeling of searching for a love with a hint of hope but can't find it in the distance.

    "If only for a moment, I'd take the risk to love you."
    ^ Love is a like a risk huh? You never know what you're in store for but with some faith and a strong hold on reality you take the leap hoping for the best. Nice way of desribing it as a risk.

    3rd Stanza.
    You described the notion of letting you and how hard it really is beautifully here. Sometimes a love is so strong within your soul that the thought of life without them is horrific and saddening. You just have to remind yourself if this love has left you and you're the only one trying to hold on then it's not worth it. Forget what you want and think about what you deserve.

    Well done on this piece. I could really feel the emotion which made it so much more real for me. *5/5*