Dreams and fairy tales

by jLegendc   Jun 21, 2008


You've probably read about Cinderella,
And believed about fairy tales,
Hoped for a prince charming,
Had a clear description of him in details...

You've probably watched romantic movies,
Hugged a pillow as they embraced passionately,
Burst out of tears because of a happy ending,
Everyone wishes that to happen in reality...

Cinderella left her glass slippers,
The prince found it and tried to find her,
But in our case, you left something for me to remember,
Memories that we've both created together...

Romantic movies that are very touching,
A plot where a guy tries to win a girl's heart,
But our story is kind of different,
I've somehow won you yet feels like we're apart...

Our story is like a movie or a fairy tale,
What's going to be the result of this affair?
No one knows it but time will tell,
After all, two things can only be called a pair...

I've dreamt of how we held each other tight,
Imagined how happy I will be,
Fantasized about the future every night,
And pictured you loving me....

I believe that some things are meant to be,
Will you make my dreams come true?
I really hope you do,
Because you know how much I love you...

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Mason

    I really liked the last two stanzas, mainly because they are exactly how i feel about a friend of mine.

    great poem 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by H E Losey

    A nice blending of life and the fairytale.. At times your rhyme scheme changes(stanzas 6&7), purposely? There seems to be no metre or rhythm here and without rhythm it becomes unpoetic.

  • 16 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    "You've probably read about Cinderella,
    And believed about fairy tales,
    Hoped for a prince charming,
    Had a clear description of him in details..."
    -Woah. Nice start! This is like the best you could write this. It caught my attention and wanted me to keep reading. Because, I could totally relate! I kept saying yes... yes... as I read it XD

    "Hugged a pillow as they embaraced passionately,"
    -Embaraced? you mean embraced? =)

    "I've somehow won you yet feels like we're apart..."
    -Maybe rewrite it like;
    "I've somehow won you, yet it feels like we're apart..."
    I'm not exactly sure were you'd want the comma. And, I think you need it before feels.. because you left that out =)

    "Our story is like a movie or a fairy tale,"
    -Nice simile, and this comes straight from the title, which is amazing. Nice job =)

    "I believe that some things are meant to be,
    Will you make my dreams come true?
    I really hope you do,
    Because you know how much I love you... "
    -Aww perfect ending!!

    Overall;
    -This poem was really amazing.
    -You had a awesome flow going.
    -Rhyming was great, and not forced.
    -A few mistakes, but not many at all. :]
    -Great work
    -5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Lizaveta

    I really loved this poem. it's such a sweet idea to compare your lovestory with Cindirella fairy-tale and with movies, still emphasizing that there is something different and unique in your story, something that you rrelly value.
    the structure of the poem and the order you tell things is well-done
    sometimes rhyme is not thorough but the rhythm is the same so i think it's ok
    5/5

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