Comments : The Angel of Secrets

  • 16 years ago

    by Michelle18

    Wow.. im so blown away by this poem.. every word just kept me wanting to read more.. i dont see anything wrong with this poem what so ever.

    its probably one of the best poems ive read in a really long time.

    "Therefore she walks down the road to hell,
    Where the voices scream and the monsters yell.
    With golden, white wings she walks with the rebels,
    Down to the angels of darkness, voices and devils."

    ^^my favorite stanza..

    amazing job. 5/5 for sure.

  • 16 years ago

    by DesiredEmpress

    OMG... u poem was very neatly written.. The whole poem was fantastic...each line made me crave for more.... I can think of so many situations that ur poem covers... It was deep. Good job, and I'm happy to say that it was long but thankful so, because it made sense unlike some others.. I loved da ending....OMG...

  • 16 years ago

    by victoria

    This was by far the best poem ive read in a very very long time.
    I never wanted it to end.
    You have a talent of wonder...

    keep writting...

    victoria

  • 16 years ago

    by Nil

    This poem gave me chills. Wonderful job. The imagery you used was brilliant. The distinct difference between light and dark in the beginning then! The ending pretty much made me speechless. 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by XLOSTxxANDxxWANDERINGX

    Omg this is like the best poem i think i have read on here trul y flowing and truly amazing. 5/5 for sure 1000/5 if it were possible.. great job

  • 16 years ago

    by linkhorizon

    Breathtaking! i read it at least twice. keep up the beautiful work. 5/5 all the way.

  • 16 years ago

    by Ray Blue

    Fantabulous poem. I wish the ending could be different. I couldn't distinguish the true irony since all lines are so ironic. Overall, its a great poem... 5/5!

  • 16 years ago

    by dora

    Wow!! amazing poem, i looked at it being so long and thought 'this has to be good' lol and it realli was. all the lines were great! it was such a powerful piece. lot of emotion in it also. great job! 5/5 xo.

  • 16 years ago

    by ether

    There's a little too much repetition in here of filler words, it would be a lot easier to read if you had less.

    For example
    "Here, between the light and the darkness, she is the one that rules,
    Here, there is no one without mistakes, only people, fools.
    The people here has been to hell, but came back again,
    Praying for God to come back, saying their last amen."

    "Between the light and darkness, she is one that rules,
    Here, there is no one without mistakes, only fools.
    People here have been to hell, came back again,
    Praying for God to come back, upon their last amen."

    Also, there's an error in that stanza "has" should be "have".
    If you take out the filler words it cuts down the line length and improves flow.

    Again, I think this was dragged out a little too long with the same ideas repeated again and again. If you mention something and then come back to it that's fine but not if it's in every third stanza.

    Also, watch the "she" factor, meaning you repeat it too much.

    Other than that, the idea of this is good, as all of the poems I've read of yours have been. You really are quite the story teller, kudos.

    I'm going to give this a 4/5 because it took me longer than it should have to read it. It'll be interesting to see what your future work is like.

    jess ~