Selfish

How can you control me like this?
How can you throw me in this abyss?
I always hoped you would some day feel what I feel.
But it seems I'm just a utensil for your meal.

You always make me feel special inside.
But at the same time, you wont stay by my side.
My brain tells me I'm being used.
But my heart can't help but be amused.

Maybe it's the unattainable goal.
Maybe it's your heart being as dark as coal.
I know you have loved and lost before.
Yet you feel nothing when you throw my heart on the floor.

Sometimes I wonder if I should be more forward with you.
Then again, if I lose you I wouldn't know what to do.
It seems that every path I choose is wrong.
All I can do is continue to go along.

I remember the very few times we kissed.
My heart leaped and I couldn't resist.
I was flying in the air and life was so clear.
I lost the world and forgot all about fear.

I can remember the feeling so clearly.
It felt like your lips were touching mine so sincerely.
I remember time freezing around us completely.
Your lips pressed against mine so sweetly.

Those moments of passion I will never forget.
I wonder if they are something you regret.
To me it meant the world and more.
Even though I know what you have for me in store.

They say that love is blind.
That it's some magical bind.
It seems like my heart is the only one that's blind.
Yet it always knows how to convince my mind.

I think the only thing true about love is that we are slaves to it.
We let it guide us where it sees fit.
We follow with great hopes of happiness.
Then we let it lead us into complete darkness.

Damn I miss those brief moments of completeness.
Your presence fills my life with sweetness.
Then you go away and drain me completely.
My heart, once again, dies discretely.