Hoping to never let go go -
of the perpetual love they share.

Go go?

As the sweet whispers of the waves,
Sends shivers up their spines...
send*

That was pretty kick ass.

I loved the words you used.

Five out of five. Great imagery too.

Aw :) .. this is a beautiful poem.

i imagined it all in my head.. its so romantic .. makes me wish that i was with my boyfriend right now lol.

you did a great job expressing how the two lovers made a deep connection. very well written.

loved it.

5/5

Hm, I didn't quite enjoy this one as much as a few other pieces I've read from you recently. I felt like you rushed the words a bit as you were writing this.

The ocean remains persistent -
up-and-down, up-and-down.
`Although I found that ending line of the stanza kind of funky, and couldn't really see the relevance, I thought about it, and find it kind of clever. -- It's like love, and relationships alike. You go through your amazing stages, and then either you fight, or you go through something horrible, but you never stop loving. Even if it ends ("down"), your feelings remain constant and never die. Pretty :)

So I was quite disappointed with the first stanza--It's really quite an extremely cliche scene. Lovers at a beach, with sand caressing their feet. I feel like, you could do more with the first two stanzas, and then it starts to rise, and ends with a much better stanza. And the last line, since I know what contest you did this for ;) fits quite well with the piece, which is why I understand the "beach" use, but could've been more creative.

:)
..__MiNDYY

^^ i dont agree with the person above.i think this poem is perfect the way it is.

it was strong. and the ending was great.and just like my gf (invisibly broken) says .. after readng this i wished i was with her.

keep up the good work. 5/5

Ahhhh Temps this was beautiful. I swear the more new poems you write the better they become! This was just amazing. Again good job on the varied vocabulary. Your imagery here was just flawless and I could imagine the scene of the two lovers and it was beautiful. The meaning behind this was deep and I loved the last line because it tied everything in together nicely. Well done hun *5/5*

You set the scene perfectly in the first stanza. Two lover sharing a roamantic stroll along the beach.

Second stanza, you reiterate the scene, adding that their love is never ending.

Third stanza, wonderful description of the waves, sweet whispers!!

Fourth stanza, apotheosize, what a wonderful mouthful and way describing the marvel of a sunset. Proliferates (grows) another great word.

You finished this piece with my favourite line, a rhyming line that summarises the whole piece beautifully!

Well done

Michael

I'm so glad you entered my contest. :)

I loved how this was turned into a happy love poem. It shows that love isn't always a bad thing! The title was simple, and fit the poem. Even though it did not rhyme, it kept the beat of it throughout the whole poem, which I know is hard to do. Word choice was simple, yet unique. This wasn't a typical poem when it came to word usage. Especially towards the end. I wanted emotion in the poem and that's what you gave.
I also LOVED that the last line was the lyric you chose, and not just thrown in there. It fit VERY WELL with the story of the poem, since you set the scene on a beach. Very creative.

Congrats on this!
5/5
~Lace

I felt like this poem got so much better as it went on. I didn't think much of the opening stanza:

"In the mist of the night,
Two lovers walk along the beach.
As they continue to walk,
The sand caresses their feet."

^^ It was too... plain, a tad boring for me. "As they continue to walk, the sand caresses their feet." - It's just kind of blunt. If you were to say something like, "As they sweet across the ocean side hand in hand, sharing the sand which caresses their feet." -- IDK, something like that.

Compare that first stanza to the very last one:

"As they apotheosize the beautiful horizon,
They exchange passionate kisses.
It is then that the ceaseless affection proliferates -
admist the two souls like never before..."

^^ ...the difference is plainly obvious. The closing stanza is beautifully written with lovely wording and vocabulary. The only thing I must point out is, 'admist' is not a word. I presume you meant 'amidst'?

Nicely done.

This poem was soft as a whisper...

You succeed to create a beautiful romantic scenery. Two lovers, ocean, waves, passionate kisses...

I think this part was extremely beautiful:
"As the sweet whispers of the waves,
Send shivers up their spines...
The ocean remains persistent -
up-and-down, up-and-down."

I think this poem was very well-written. I like it a lot. I could not help myself dreaming about going to some nice beach with my 3asal. *smiles*

If you purpose was to make people daydreaming for a moment, you did good...

Wish you all the best for the contest!

Beautiful. One word to some it up: Absolutely Magnificent. Okay that was two words but something this...expressive cannot be summed up with only one words. Great job, the word choice was flawless and unique. And the flow smoother than silk. (5/5)

This was just simply beautiful. I really liked this one alot, I could just picture it all happen., and true love never dies, everyone just gets grown up.

keep it up.
keep on writing.
love always and forever.

Aww...this is so cute...
love it!

This poem made me drift off onto that very actual beach lol loved it very much. i truly envisioned every line. 5 all the way. great work!

Hey great poem, but your last line "Like the riseing tide, beating hearts grow but never die" is from the song When Two Are One by:Atreyu.....Don't get me wrong, ur poem is amazing, but I don't think its right for you to put someones lyrics in a poem without giving them credit. It makes people think you actually came up with it. Maybe you did just come up with it but those are the exact lyrics and it just caught my attention.

Lovely poem. I enjoyed it.
good work

Yeah i noiced the lyrics thing too from atreyu but besides that i think its well written. i think the whole love scene where two lovers are walking on a beach is very cliche but you defied that.

Very sweet and pleasant. Brings a smile upon my face. Very nice work. Loved this one.

I really like the last line "Like the rising tide, beating hearts grow but never die."

I love word play and that last line is great. Excellent job, 5/5

Another poem of yours I thought was pretty good. I think you would do well fitting rhymes into your poems if you tried. I'd like to see something like that from you, if you're ever interested. Very nice.

Up-and-down, up-and-down.
The only suggestion i have is to change the second up and down .. And I don't understand the "-" . Perhaps to something like
Up , and down . Up , and back down again .
Otherwise , I like it . The words flow nicely .. And the imagery is creative . Very good job , and I've never seen a 5/5 out of 21 votes before .