by Lousy Eyes Jun 29, 2008
category :
Sadness, depression /
other
To the mirror she stands in front of the reflection. |
There is some potential here and I think you have a good idea for a poem, but you don't communicate it very well. This poem consists of almost no flow, which makes it difficult to read and there are a few punctuation mistakes that momentarily break the reader's concentration and understanding. Again, I do like the idea of the poem, and I think that if you were to rewrite it, it could be something most pleasant to read. |