Just A Stupid Girl

Sometimes I get tired of your childish ways,
Then think, is this really how I want to spend my days?

Told that I'm first but coming out second or third,
Of course, having it your way is what is preferred.

I get tired of smiling, pretending it's OK,
At the same time wondering if it'll get better the next day.

Hating these thoughts as they cross through my mind,
My heart just wanting to rewind.

Way before I was filled with unconscious thoughts,
Before I received that look that puts my stomach in knots.

Being aware of this all I should know what to do,
But it would be too easy to just say that I'm done with you.

Maybe a stupid girl is what I am,
To allow myself to be stuck in this jam.

I used to believe in the lyrics of what my favorite song said,
"I know what's best for me but I want you instead."