Starlight

by InvisiblyHeartless   Jun 30, 2008


The road dark and desolate like her mind
A silver heart and thorn-less rose on a chain
Lying warmly on her center of her collarbone
Tucked under her crimson red shirt and jacket
Tonight wasn't the reason it belonged there
It was her loyal and hidden tribute he earned
The vehicle slowed and stopped in a clearing
In her drunken passion she saw him watching
When the symbol of his true love for her
Glimmered reassuringly in the beautiful starlight

Why was he so effortlessly following the tracks
That were left unmade in the woods they toured
Her openly unmeaning offer of herself was enough
For the truth in her actions shone as bright as bark
To him she was everything, to her he was a memory
That she just couldn't recall under tonights power
The reason he glided amongst trees without crashing
Meant her lost love and betrayal finally caught him
He wasn't a mirage, or a dream, he watched her
Leaving the blood of his heart to glimmer in starlight

Asleep she lay with him haunting her confused state
Making her aware that something couldn't fit
The traitor next to her was not the one she wished
The heart on her chest reminded her of his fatal cry
Yet he couldn't be dead because he was still breathing
Beside her he lay smiling warmly as he dreamed
Wait! That wasn't the one she longed for at all
She thought about all that she drank and wished
That he would wait for her somewhere for her love
All the lone stranger saw were bodies and a knife
Cold and lonely glimmering in the hopeful starlight

*for the contest.*

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Faithless Watermelon

    The lack of punctuation made this a bit hard for me to follow; I ended one line expecting it to be one complete thought, and then i was confused by the next one being an extension, or just the second part. I didn't see a particular form here. Perhaps the 10-line stanza should have caught me on, but there was no sort or rhyme scheme, or punctuation to help me with the flow. Another thought that hit me was that you could possibly split up the stanzas to make them smaller, and thus easier to read.

    All in all, it wasn't bad. The story had meaning, and I think it was just lost in too many lines squished together. Keep writing though, we all have room to get better

  • 16 years ago

    by Fsams

    Loved the ending. Its a lovely free verse. I enjoyed the descriptive quality. tc

  • 16 years ago

    by kate

    This poem was great. to tell you the truth, like i usually get images in my head about peoples poems but this one i didn't till the end, i don't know i guess i couldnt fellow it well or something but i did think this was good, what i got out of it after i read the last line was i think that this person waited for him to be there and when he finally was, they were finally over, i don't know if thats what or how you wrote it but thats what i got out of it. but again it was a great poem.

    keep it up.
    keep on writing.
    love always and forever.

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