Why her

Everyday I sit in my room
Thinking about what could be more wrong
Until my phone rings.
Its my best friends mum
Calling to say that my friend has died.
What has she done to desreve this?
I think to my self.
She was such a fun loving person.
The grief on my head
Is nothing imaginable
I just wish i could rewind and pause.
To the time she had her first love
And when she went on her first date.
Losing a friend is something you'll never forget.
After a while i have had enough of this shit.
My mum and I are fighting
and i just lost my friend
I think to myself
"why should i live??"
I write a letter to those who i loved.
And left it on the table.
I grabbed the gun and reloaded it.
I took one last look at the sun rising
Just one click and i will be dead.
I held my breathe and mumbled
"I'm sorry but this is the only way"
I pulled the trigger...
Now I am dead.
All those that i loved have been hurt but was it worth it??
Thats for me to decide!!!!!