Isn't worth the while

Here i go again
putting on this smile
i start to cry and then
i decide it isn't worth the while.

acting like I'm okay
acting like I'm happy
having the best day
happy finally

I'm smiling until i reach my door
and step inside these stupid walls
and suddenly my tears just pour
having no one there, and no one to call

i have it all
or that's what they say
always standing tall
but that's not how it is everyday

everyday is another death to die
everyday is another stupid lie
everyday is another secret to hide
everyday is another stupid smile

if this is perfect, i don't like it
if this is happy, I'm not smiling
if this is love, i don't want it
if this is friendship, take it back

you think I'm okay?
shows how well you know me
this is just another day
in the life of my misery.

it's the same thing
the same thing everyday
the same song to sing
the same line to say

i can't wait until i die
i can't wait to see what you do
i can't wait until you realize
I'm not perfect compared to any of you

so here i go again
putting on this smile
wipe the blood from my wrist and then
decide this life isn't worth the while.

*please vote and comment.. it means a lot to me.