We're All Prisoners
by Never Will Be Broken Jul 9, 2008
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We all live in our own world |
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Latest Comments
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16 years ago
This poem is so true. No matter how bad off you think you have it, theres always someone out there who's worse off. People like attention and one way to get it is to play the "oh woe is me" card, and most of the time it works. I think we all need to open our eyes a little more and stop only caring about ourselves.
This is a really good poem, i hope to see more
;)
<3 -
16 years ago
by StandStill
First off, this is a great poem. I really enjoyed it. The emotion's pretty strong and the word use is lovely. The flow is near perfect...there are a couple of places that could be tuned up. but eh, what poem doesnt need some tuneage?
Mourning over things out of reach
Cursing at our fate
All hold such conceited thoughts
So much self-pity and hate
^^ This was one of my favorite stanzas ((it was hard to pick. lol)). The only bit i didn't like is that the flow gets off on the last line. it needs one more beat...other than that, it's a very true statement.
This poem was great. It reaches out to the reader and strongly gets your point across..Adding punctuation would be good, but again, just a technicality ((i always hate it when people tell me to add punctuation, so sorry. XD)). good job. <3
