Princess

Ok well i really liked this one i dont know what it is with you and vampires but i like it at first i thought it would be like a love thing but i like the victim thing better great job!!

Very interesting write. You did a great job with the comparison between the victim and the predator. It was pretty dark as well. With the last stanza:

'I'm unpolished-stone
And you are Diamond
I'm Vampire and you're my victim'

^^great ending. Overall, you did a good job. But I would have to agree with Karl Wild when he said that the fact that it was so short and simple, it's hard to give it a 5. But I gave it a 4/5.

Great job

--Kay Jay

To be truthful its kinda random, it was good, a little too short and i dont really get how everything fits together, it was good just kinda random, its very well written though and i have seen your work before, you have come an interesting way from then....good job and keep up the good work ^^

You are a princess
Smart, Sweet, and Stylish
That everyone loves

i like this stanza, i like how you emphasize, smart, sweet, and stylish by capitalizing the first letter, it makes it seem more like a person, other than what they are. like they have a person inside them that makes them this way. if you get what im saying

I'm a Vampire...
Wild, Rough, and Ugly
That everyone hates

the next stanza is pretty wicked, you to have your own liitle personns inside you but ugly isnt alway inside. is it? it makes me think that your not worth this "princess" but you wish you were.

I'm unpolished-stone
And you are Diamond
I'm Vampire and you're my victim

some unpolished stones are very beautful so some perspective might be off. and diamonds dont last forever, maybe you going for love that might happen? because th next line you say she is your victim, so maybe obsessed? idk.

very good poemm. i really liked it. it opened my eyes to some new poetry.

For such a short poem there are many mistakes all have been pointed out to you and you still have not corrected them what is the point of asking for comments if you do not learn from those far superior to you at English grammar.
3/5 Ray S