For some reason, these words are blocked from me,
No poems need to pour out.
My eyes bloom and wither sleepily,
from a night filled with reinforcement and doubt.
I litterally cried out for You,
just writing these words makes the tears come.
I'm trying so hard now to find You...
Lord, this brick, it weighs a ton.
"Show me! Show me!" I cry to You,
and still the silence prevades my ears.
Curled up in a ball, not moving, not thinking..
and to my eyes came tears.
All I heard was silence,
and still I do not understand.
God, SHOW ME that You're here,
so that I can stop fighting Your hand.
Jesse says the tears mean something,
he says that I should quit this fight.
But Jesse has so much more faith than me,
he's not desperately searching for a fight.
If You're there, please tell him I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I can't verbalize.
If You're there, then God, I thank you,
for him forcing those tears to my eyes.
God....I need more help than he could give me,
I need to feel you here.
Where are you, my God, my Lord...
why did You disappear?
"I wanna believe in love again"
**Jesse, this is what I got out of last night. I still don't know. But I'm trying. I'm trying so hard...**
