"All the things you have done to me,
The life you stole from my heart,
And the imagination you stole from my dreams,
Gone. Without a trace."
^^ I didn't like the use of fillers. Maybe :
""All the things you have done to me,
life you stole from my heart,
imagination you stole from my dreams,
Gone. Without a trace."
"Anger pulsing through my body,
Distorting the world around of me,
I can see your face in my mind,
Too far out of my control."
^^I liked this stanza, I found it to hold alot of depth and power.
"The chair glides past your sombre face,
Wood splintering on the wall,
The shouting gets louder, they're panicking
Now, I won't ever leave you.
^^I don't think you need "the" on the third line.
"Torture and hate are the ones for you,
They make you feel on top of the world,
But no matter what hell you put me through,
I will stand by you, loyal as always."
^^Favourite stanza of the piece. So much hurt mixed with loyalty that it makes for an interesting affect.
I liked the single lines, read together they were line another verse of the piece.