What Hurts the Most [Darling, you make me sick]

by BlueEyedMystery   Jul 26, 2008


Screaming in vexation once again, as your face clawed it's way into my mind. Who would have ever thought that smile could one day drive me insane?

Can you, please, refill my prescription of lies?

Honey, you left me here when you swore you wouldn't. I knew you would, reality like an itch at the back of my mind. But pretending was so much sweeter to these taste buds, than choking down acid truth like the foul taste of medicine. You know, that kind the doctor always prescribed before you were lucky enough to swallow pills.

I'll take a shot if you don't mind, let the needle plunge deep into my skin. Pain always goes well with this kind of medicine, the kind thick with betrayal.

Darling, you make me sick.
Like falling off a cliff, I'm dizzy.
Your memory making my head spin so rapidly it just might fall off. While descending into the hazy fog of our past bile pollutes my stomach, threatening to come up.

Maybe it's just the anger talking, but you're just like all the rest. Candy-coating your words before you thrust them down my throat.

Eyes stinging with acidic tears, burning holes in the floor.

And just maybe I'd do anything to have you pour those liquor filled lies down my throat again. Intoxicate the mind before taking advantage of the weak, and playing make-believe with my fragile heart.

But all I can do is destroy myself, because what hurts the most is that I let you slip through my fists, like an hourglass that ran out of sand.

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This needs more work, but I needed to vent really bad..

Anndd. This is a Prose not a poem. Just thought I'd clear that up. :]

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  • 16 years ago

    by neo

    Great poem. I can ABSOLUTELY RELATE. I prefer a vent over a ryme anytime hehe 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Blissful

    Wow. Oh boy that was just amazing! I could truly related with that deep feeling of betrayal and you mesmerized me with your descriptions. The sarcasm here was beautiful and words such as "Darling" and "Honey" just put the cherry on top of this wonderful masterpiece which truly blew me away.

    "Can you, please, refill my prescription of lies?"
    ^WOW. I just loved how unique this sounded and how different it was. The meaning behind it was clear and you worded it nicely.

    "Candy-coating your words before you thrust them down my throat."
    ^Oh my amazing! Each word it just fit perfectly making for an amazing line that stood out to me the most out of this poem. "Candy-coating" and "thurst" were great words to use here for describing your meaning because I could FEEL what you were expressing.

    I loved every minute of this and wouldnt change a thing. You took something everyone has felt before, betrayal, and made it into a masterpiece.

    Well done.
    *5/5*

  • 16 years ago

    by Soraya Lowe

    Oh my God! That was amazing. I was able to imagine everything you were saying, and your analogies were quite clever.

    From start to finish, I loved it. It's written unusually for me, but I do like the way you spaced your stanzas.

    Great job!!!!

    5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    Your flow was very good in my book, that is to say I found your free verse was smooth
    even though I could feel the venting the imagery helped me to feel what you were feeling as you wrote this piece. I do not believe your disapointment altered your creativity

    I like it
    5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    This poem was so unique. I came into this poem before reading it thinking that it would be clique because usually most friendship poems can be very easily. Anyways, but come to find out.. this poem was so unique and I loved the way that you vented in this one. The way you expressed your emotions were so unique. The way you worded your feelings here were so amazing! Gah! I'm at lost for words. Simply a very great write. :] Great word-choice. Everything was nearly perfect. I wouldn't change a thing with this one. It fits okay as prose I thought.. it's venting.. that's probably the best format you could have used. :] Well done!! I'm going to add you to my favorites. You keep impressing me with your poetry. Keep it up. 5/5.

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