Comments : Thinking with the Spirit

  • 16 years ago

    by BREEawNUHH

    Wow. This is an excellent piece.

    "Have you ever peered through spiritual eyes?
    To gaze far past all incarnate physical, lies?
    When it seems all begins and ends with thought
    That all your pain and suffering is all for naught"

    ^^ In the last line, you should remove one of the "all"'s, because I feel like it might confuse the reader. It did me.

    However, that is the only thing I can find in this piece that I'm not too sure of. I thought it was written wonderfully. 5/5

    ``Briana

  • 16 years ago

    by she

    My darkest hour before the dawn, or so it seemed
    Was right before I accepted the truth to be redeemed
    --yea it seems the lord always finds us in our darkest hour

    your spiritual poems are always very nice

  • 16 years ago

    by Jennifer RIP Lesthat Hayden

    Though your thoughts may be tormented and torn
    To the point that you regret the day you were born

    I like that a lot. There are so many people that end up hating who they are and hating their lives and it brings them to regret their parents ever creating them in the first place.

    The last part was perfect. Great way to end it.

    Five out of five.