Sorrow Glistens in Darkened Eyes

A very vivid portrait of sadness. I can feel that you are saddened and even though you smile it's never truly as it was before(truly it never will be).

This is a wonderful piece and it's one that you should be proud of. I really enjoyed the read. I apologize for the late reply of the comments. I've had to take an absence due to family problems.

This is a wonderful poem, it's truly one I enjoyed to read and wished it were longer; poems like this are too good to go further.

Amarthine,

Sorrow described as another entity, a living, breathing, persecuting demon, whose sole purpose is to infest its disease around, upon and inside its victim.

Sorrow stands still; as my shadow,
but...
When the sun fades away he is gone.
^^
To me you are saying your sadness is powerless until the sunset, and then it becomes…

Then sorrow is all around; covering the moon,
except...
No one can see him in the dark, and sadly even dawn.
^^
..an entity all around. 'Covering the moon' The moon is like a face, so it being covered would shroud its face and its brightness, reducing a person’s character, strength of will..

Sometimes he hides behind my smile,
or...
Just covers it up with his cloak.
^^
..sadness is a male, symbolising strength, but also discrimination towards women, maybe? But sadness as we know is an 'it' because it doesn't discriminate….unless this sadness has been caused by a man?

Eyes blind; I still feel his touch,
and...
It cuts deep into my chest.
^^
Using the words 'cut and chest' together creates incredible images that are intensely powerful and graphically destructive.

Crushing the last piece of my heart,
then...
Sorrow still has me tide to him.
^^
Here you end with Mr Sorrow, the victor. He has succeeded in consuming your strength and so is content.

I love your version of this title. In my mind it is much visually stronger than mine. Your structure and choice of words have created images that hang in the reader’s mind, whilst catching their breath with the suspense you expertly created.

Well done

Michael

Wow. a lot of feeling in that one i love it. a bit mystyrious but yet can be obvious to anyone depending on what some one is thinking about when they read it i love it.