The Emotions Have Receded, But the Feelings Remain Unchanged

by BrokenREALiTy   Aug 1, 2008


For ninety two days your specter remained at bay,
but one foul movement and it encircles the icy atmosphere,
devastating the renovation within my beating mind.
These scabs are meant for healing, but this vision never fades;
--evermore scraping at a gate put up for reason.

The paint's beginning to chip and cracks are molding,
and I do suppose it makes no sense for denying needed repair,
but what to do when the new coat will merely fail, too?

There's a rational explanation for all this basking,
while it's been made quite clear that the wound is to be dressed.
--as to when is the question, and how, quite frankly,
will we ever keep the bandages in place?
For an averse patient is a difficult one, and I don't have time to squander.

Let me be rather frank, doctor, that I don't require fixing.
I once begged for these gashes to mend with most alacrity,
but I've come to accept that my emotions are completely spent.

--though I can't say the same for my feelings.
I must apologize for any confusion, for I know that, typically,
there are no distinctions between the two. But trust me on this, dear,
loving someone and yearning for their once adoring gaze...
Those are two things that are to remain utterly diverse.

For a lover's heart and a lover's stare are two entirely separate assets,
so when you lose the one, is the other ever enough?

©20080729 Mindy Huang

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  • 16 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    Title; Woww. I was impressed. It's long but it also says so much and gives you a great idea as to what the poem will be about. :]

    "For ninety two days your specter remained at bay,"
    `I love how you actually put a specific number down, ninety two days..but I'm pretty sure you need a hyphen between ninety-two if you write it out. :]

    "Let me be rather frank, doctor, that I don't require fixing.
    I once begged for these gashes to mend with most alacrity,
    but I've come to accept that my emotions are completely spent.

    --though I can't say the same for my feelings.
    I must apologize for any confusion, for I know that, typically,
    there are no distinctions between the two. But trust me on this, dear,
    loving someone and yearning for their once adoring gaze...
    Those are two things that are to remain utterly diverse."
    `Oh wowww. I loved how you were actually talking in this part. You said everything so well. These lines were worded absolutely perfectly!! The vocabulary is outstanding as well. :]

    "For a lover's heart and a lover's stare are two entirely separate assets,
    so when you lose the one, is the other ever enough?"
    `Mindy. Wow. I loved this ending. It was a question and it was a powerful one as well. I loved the way you ended the poem with a question, it works fabulously!

    Overall, wonderful write. I love how you wrote this poem, it's just so unique all together.. the format was interesting as well.. I love your vocabulary, it blows me away. You use some pretty complex words.. IMO.. but they sound so wonderful in the poem. Great job, keep it up. (: 5/5

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