Angel

A great poem, the you've and your's put me off though but truthfully i loved it and you did a good job!!

Its cool! 4/5

Are you really 15 going on a 100 this was too deep for me at first though the poem was well worded and written. I have to agree with Casey the use of you're and you've detracted from its overall flow. You are obviously at a very vunerable age as I am not sure if this is a hate or love poem and as in the other poem of yours that I read you use your poetry to purge your anger I am glad of that as I would hate to be on the end of any of you physical anger ha! ha!, there thats a response and I did enjoy it after I read it a couple of times. Keep expressing 5 /5 Ray

You're an angel with beaten down wings.
You've got blood lust written on your face,
You've long lost your golden halo.
You're an exiled angel of heaven.
You've got bloody beaten wings
And your tired face looks sober.
`` This is really good, but you kind of get distracted by all the "You're", "You've" 's. I think it would flow a lot better if you only put a few of those in there. :]

I can see the hate in your eyes,
The coldness, whats left of your soul.
As you told me you loved me
With one hand at my throat.
Tempted to bleed me, your weakness
And your very last drop of hope.
`` I love this whole stanza. It's like when someone tells you they love you and it kills you.

You're ending was good. Brought the whole thing together nicely.

Well done.

Keep writing!

..|CAYYCE|..

Nice poem(:
I like it alott.
5/5