She never really loved him

Dead in her head and cold to the bone,
She took the knife and slit her wrist whole.
Not once thinking of those she left behind,
Fueled by those mistakes that burned her alive.

Wanting to believe that she loved him all along,
Realizing too late it was all painfully wrong.
"I love you" is all it took to make her heart melt,
Not once realizing the same way she never felt.

What else to do if not tell the truth?
That though she cares love does not bloom in it's youth.
That once she thought she'd want to live with him forever,
That hope just came crashing down saying "Never!".

She thought that he meant everything to her in this world,
That mere happiness from his words continually swirled.
She thought that he would be the one to take away the pain,
The one with him she'd spend time, together forever to remain.

She thought he'd whisper those words so sweet,
That in an instant their eyes would meet.
Two souls would be connected forever through time,
And upon their lips be uttered "You're mine!".

She thought that the love so easily declared was not falsity read,
That deep in her heart she wanted to believe all that he said.
But she know better than to cling onto false hope,
Thinking that tomorrow will beckon happily and she won't mope.

She thought he was the reason for her sudden bounts of joy,
That just by thinking of him her sadness would be destroyed.
She so badly wanted to believe that she really loved him,
But now the truth is such that she never ever loved him.

Things were so different a few weeks back,
But a few days ago and the excruciating pain came back.
Though unbearable as it was not even painkillers could help,
Even tears could not fall down silently to express what she felt.

She thought that it was because she was afraid,
That one day she'll wake up and realize she's been betrayed.
That she'll never see the shine in his eyes again,
Or hear his sweet voice and in silence she'll have to contain.

Every feeling that ever poured out from her soul,
For days have now revealed the truth that shall control.
Dead in her head and cold to the bone,
She turned around and realized that she's all alone.