The Icy Ditches (Hell part 2)

by InvisiblyHeartless   Aug 5, 2008


Shards of ice ready to drop silently
Destroying more hopeful wishes
She was a s l u t pouncing around
Yet landing him seemed more real
Than the desperate freezing her felt
Landing hard on gleaming shards
Staggered on the cliff's hanging edge
One thing he was absolutely sure
This was a horrid place called hell
No nature to see and ponder about
No green to enjoy and play games on
Just the icy cold white glitter laying
In blankets upon the frozen ground
She was feeding off him, fire on ice
Melting his heart somehow far away
And soaking up the droplets of water
Like an abandoned little sick kitten

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Nobodys Hero

    Very imaginative, i totally agree with leap of faith this poem is excellent. Your wording is very good and i was kept interested throughout.
    =]

  • 16 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    Title: Amazing! Caught my attention yet again.

    Great write. It was interesting...yet again. I love how in the first line of the poem you said shards of ice.. that was a wonderful word to use. Uhmm, vocabulary is good. But, yet again I would like a rhyme with this poem! I think if you added a rhyme the flow would be better. Other than that, you did a fabulous job!! 5/5

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