Distance Makes No Difference {Collab}

by BREEawNUHH   Aug 9, 2008


*Actual title: Distance Makes No Difference In The Hearts Of Lovers

*Collab with Temps - http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/author.html?id=360972

*First stanza is mine, then her, than I, etc..

There once was a boy and girl,
who fell in love from the start.
No one could separate them,
because the love was too strong.

Lies eventually got in the way,
which ripped their hearts apart.
Leading to years of hurt and loss,
and a broken relationship.

For years they were upset,
and they tried to move on.
But in the end, it was the same --
no one could ever compare.

The tears of hurt and loss dried,
and both hearts were mended...
As the connection between the two-
came back to life once again.

They couldn't believe it was real,
that they were together once more.
You'd never catch them apart,
or without love in their eyes.

Forever they remained as one,
for they were meant to be together.
Never did they let go for one second,
for their love was unlike any other.

BREE aw NUHH & Leap Of Faith aka Temps
08.08.08

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by HvN

    The poem was very good, great description. I would argue against the distance thing though because i believe it really does matter, once that longing feeling comes it brings with it a sadness and at times no matter how strong the love, they cannot hold on.

    great job,

    5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    Your thoughts flowed well in this freeverse poem. I cannot find anything to criticise here

  • 16 years ago

    by CourtneyyContageous

    Wow, you two are amazing together. I can really relate to this poem, and for me that's always a plus. The story of two lovers, ripped apart, only to find themselves back in the arms of one another. You opened the poem so graciously.The scene was set, and from then on it was smooth sailing.

    "Forever they remained as one,
    for they were meant to be together.
    Never did they let go for one second,
    for their love was unlike any other."

    I love the way this poem was ended. In love, and love is the best feeling to have.

    The only critique I have, is more of an opinion, I've been told by a few people, and even an english teacher of mine. There's really no need for the periods and commas after a line. It's believed to be an automatic pause.

    Great job you two!

    5/5

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