Unwanted Feeling

Laying in bed
Under my sheets
Not caring what happens
As my heart beats

The one dream I want
Cant possibly come true
I'm not that lucky
As that I knew

This must be
What reality feels like
Heart broken and crushed
Both feeling alike

Its not what I wanted
But it happened how it did
Ill have to deal with this issue
As breaking up I do forbid

The tears are flowing
Like Niagara Falls
Just wondering what will happen
When god calls

Saying its my turn
Ive lived my life
Not too the fullest
I pay that small price

Face all red
From crying so much
Nose is running
Hurting to the touch

It doesn't matter
What I feel
The decision is made
Why this happens, is just unreal

I'm going back
To crying in my bed
Its the only thing I'm good for
As I wish I was dead

I pictured this
In a different way
But it is what it is
Theres nothing to say

Tears of joy
Is all I need
But when I'm like this
All my heart does, is bleed