Battling the Tears

Here I go, one more time...
Writing to replace the tears
In the same place, on the same paper
Its been a comfort for so many years

Knowledge of what to do is lost
Wishing I was numb
Falling apart in every which way
Noises mix and turn into a hum

Not wanting to know what's coming...
The decision is unavoidable
Not knowing what to expect next
My body is suddenly unstable

I crumble
Falling to the floor
Trying to be brave
As the silent tears being to pore

I rip my eyes away from your face
Trying to hide my shame
Mistakes so horrible...
I'm the one to blame?

I only hurt you
So why do you stay?
I really want you to be happy
Am I in your way?

I can't give you what you need right now
I can't be around always
Holding you back
Its only a matter of days

I really do want to be here for you
I want my decision to feel right
I want us to work out someday soon...
So I'll battle the tears again tonight.

By: Deanna Hill
March 22, 2009(C)