I jump off the roof-
Oh, last dying gasp!
free falling through the wind
that could grab my weak spirit
right out of the air and drown me-
but instead; lets me fall...
One last time- I look up-
The dark clouds swarming above me
with all the regrets I remember
and all the mistakes I couldn't fix
I realize its time to destroy it-
My very existence, the meaning of this name...
So I plunge, but my own will
into the depths of this dirty, mucky
guilt-stricken, jaded swirling water...
And then- OH GOD!
A Breath!
A breath like never before-
What is this, Life?
I scarcely remember the feeling
that envelopes my newborn body now...
And what is this, Love?
This warmth surrounding me,
caressing me, filing me inside and out.
I look at my hands- Brand new!
like no disgusting sin has touched them before-
And my eyes! Look into my Eyes!
Not faded! No, no longer empty!
Oh amazing Grace! They are the Sun!
Shining so bright and pure like never before.
My body moist and clean, I look into the water...
No, not jaded- Emerald!
Washing my soul like the gem itself,
So sparkling! So new! Oh Glory!
Awestruck by this personal baptism,
I have an epiphany, that the very moment
I jumped, was the moment I trusted You,
loved You enough to let myself fall to death
to rid You of my inconceivable injustices-
was the very same moment you saw me leap,
and loved me back, then in a blink-
You extinguished my gasp....and lit my breath.
Oh, how phenomenal was that newborn breath
As you lifted my lungs to the surface...
So now, in new Life,
the wind carries my eyes toward the sky
And instead of the ominous clouds like the moment before
There, shining in the sun, is Your smile.
