by Shinobi Aug 26, 2008
category :
Friendship, family /
love, friendship
Starts or beginnings are hardest to create |
Amazing job! im speechless! :) 5/5 |
Very good very descriptive of what goes on in some peoples mind when they think of starting a relationship with someone 5/5 |
by Melanie
Wow! Great insights, i loved it =) |
I've onlt seen a few problems within you poem. the first may not be a mistake, but maye just a confusion for me. "Starts or new beginnings" It threw me off. But the second time around it read nicely. Maybe think of revising the first line? But only just a little. The second issue I had you put a comma after "At first," I think it would sound alot better if you put the comma after kiss. The rest of this poem was written very good, the flow was constant. Other than the few problems I had with it, it was a joy to read. 5/5 |
by The Queen
I absolutely loved the rhythm of this piece although there was one line that made it a bit off. |