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by MyMuse   Aug 27, 2008


I am a girl that walks around the hallways with a smile
Even if it is just for that while
When I look back and forth, I see nowhere to belong
Somehow I keep going strong

Even when I keep failing, I keep on trying
While I try to keep myself from crying
The tears in my eyes make it hard to see
Why can't anyone just accept that this is me

Once I did enjoy how this world all so called life
I didn't want to take the knife to end my life
I was always a happy little girl
All the flashbacks come back to me in one big swirl

People say people get what they want if they try really hard
I am trying but all I got given to me was a card
That said "Why don't you go kill yourself?"
Well I guess I am doing them and me a favor because I really don't like myself

What would happen if I did go, no more me
You and everyone would be full of glee
I really can't stand this
Even when I am dead, I didn't have my first kiss

When I am gone, I left a letter
Even though I know your life is better
So is mine, I don't half to be full of pain
Because now I am in the arms of death and hes keeping me sane

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    "I was always always a happy little girl
    All the flashbacks come back to me in one big swirl"

    there are two "always" when there should be only one.

    "because I really dont like myself"

    dont should be don't.

    "What happen if I did go, no more me
    You and everyone would be full of glee"

    I think it would sound better if you put "would" after what.

    "I really cant stand this
    Even when I am dead, I didn't have my first kiss"

    cant should be can't.
    And in the second line, I would reread it, the last part doesn't make much sense to me.

    "When I am gone, I left a left a letter"

    ^should be: "I left a letter".

    "Even though I know your life is better
    So is mine, I don't half to be full of pain
    Because now I am in the arms of death and hes keeping me sane"

    hes should be he's. Otherwise, I love that last part, good rhyming and very heartfelt. So my advice would to just go back and look over this poem, and make some changes. But other than that, this is a good poem that has good emotions. Keep writing, always and forever...

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