Our Fairytale

by Jenni Marie   Sep 5, 2008


{Those startling baby blues...}

Everytime I gaze into those eyes, lost in seas of emotion
Ecstasy completely over riding me, slowly taking my soul
Floating endlessly on waves of love, could stay here forever
For you've become my utopia and I don't want to leave

{That smirk like smile...}

Everytime I see your smile my heart soars, I'm flying
Flying so carelessly among the realms of paradise
And I'm so euphoric up here, never want to leave
For I'm lost in this world and you're the reason why

{Those kissable lips...}

Everytime you kiss me, become deliciously delirious
Those lips gently on mine, left again in a state of bliss
As the kisses deepen slowly, feeling you smile slightly
And once more I'm all caught up in this beautiful passion

{Those loving arms...}

Nestled securely in your embrace, safe from outside world
Hearts beating in unison, so content and peaceful again
Every touch so tender, so welcome and so cherished
If I close my eyes, the rest of the world ceases to exist

{That beautiful soul, that loving heart...}

Everytime we're together, the world could be falling apart
And I wouldn't notice because I'm so wrapped up in you
Two hearts, two souls, rapidly melting together as one
Darling, seems we've created our own magical fairytale

    report violation
0


Did You Like This Poem?

Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Reapers ZeitGeiSt

    That was a nice one to read..keep it that way
    you have a great way to describe feelings...drifting
    away from reality(that's good sometimes)

  • 16 years ago

    by Robert

    I liked this poem for the most part it was very warm and loving. The images were both loving and tender the meaning was a soft gift of compassion to the one it was meant for all and all a good read Plot121.

  • 16 years ago

    by LockedInEternity

    Very nice write. Extremely predictable, but then again love is pretty predictable in itself.

    Some phrases you wrote were a bit cliche and rather overused such as this "state of bliss" idea you mention over and over again using all sorts of synonyms.

    The phrases in brackets were a cute add on.. and they made good sense in your poem. This is one of the things that actually made your poem original.. so i would ignore anyone who tells you to get rid of them. They give the poem your own personal touch rather than it being the same old love poem we've read over and over again. Creative touch.

    Free verse was a good choice as all the possible variations of "love" rhyming with " above" and so on were used up years ago.. i know because i too fell victim to them at one point i think.. lol

    Overall, i liked this poem.. it had some sparks of raw emotion at the base, which i liked.. although you could go further and cross the boundaries if you had wanted to.

    5/5 - enjoyed the read.

  • 16 years ago

    by ether

    I like the little subtitles that lead to the stanzas, they're cute and somewhat aesthetically pleasing.

    This is good. Not your average love poem (thank God). It still had the same elements that love poems generally have but you built on them with your vocabulary very nicely. It's sweet and indepth, almost analysing what you like about that person.

    Some of the metaphors were a little unoriginal such as "I'm flying", but that's nothing major.

    Great poem, 5/5

    jess ~

  • 16 years ago

    by Sweet lig

    Hmm this one seems like a song, its a great fairytale story and the message was powerful. the emotions are very well express. i enjoyed the rhyming i can truly relate and very outstanding. keep up the good work ... marvelous 5/5

Read All Comments (8)

More Poems By Jenni Marie