I just want to cry;
i feel like I'm losing everything in my life.
and everyone.
its like everyone is fading away from me.
there changing into different people
who i don't know.
what have i turned in to?
with my addiction
its the only thing that cures me.
and Ive never felt so alone in my life.
i want to fall into your arms.
and stop breathing.
i want to die besides you.
i want to live beside you.
i just want to be someone else
someone who is pretty and fun
someone who has a good life
i don't want to move away
i don't want to make new friends.
i wish everything was still the same.
i don't want to have to pretend to smile.
i don't want to have to explain why I'm upset.
i just want to cry into your shoulder.
but i might be losing you to.
i might be losing you to one of my friends.
who's prettier and skinner than me.
and it kills me.
it freaking kills me that the last good thing;
in my life is fading away too.
your that little bit of hope i have.
i don't want to share you.
i just want to love you.
thank god i have you.
because if i didn't i wouldn't survive.
i would die.
and now life is so confusing.
and terrible.
and my past
it haunts me, what have i done?
i just want to fall into your arms.
i want to live again.
i feel like the world has turned its back on me.
like life has abandoned me.
and I'm afraid of dying.
of going to where i belong.
hell.
and I'm afraid of living eternally.
in heaven.
and I'm afraid of becoming a ghost.
wondering aimlessly.
and I'm afraid that i will forget;
about this life.
my whole life I've been a quitter.
when it gets too tough i quit.
and i quit on you.
and i quit on her.
and to put it softly...
i want to die.
my heart has been broken too many times.
my hopes have been shattered.
my dreams; destroyed.
my whole life I've been living
so that one day i could die.
that i could rot in the ground.
that people could cry over my dead body.
i cant make new friends.
i cant even keep the ones i have.
i just want to fall into your arms.
