The wreckage of a girl

by Nobody   Sep 13, 2008


Emptiness builds a home of a girl
like a virus it is spread
to every part of this decaying soul
eating away at every connecting thread

nothingness feeds like a savage inside
leaving nothing consider of worthy remains
cold thoughts of suicide consumes the mind
left to suffer in this unbearable pain

agony torments this teen
it poisons the mind
she hides what can't be seen
she has been left behind

depression leaves her with no escape
It feeds on loneliness and creates a void
stricken with grief for she knows it too late
for she is slowly being destroyed

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Ingrid

    It is very hard to get out of this circle of pain and depression once you are in...you have described it very vividly...
    Good job!

    Take care,

    5/5 Ingrid

  • 16 years ago

    by AngelicDecadence

    Emptiness builds a home of a girl
    like a virus its spreads
    to every part of this decaying soul
    eating away at every connecting thread

    This was really good. There were a few spots where the flow was.. off, a tiny bit. ^^^this stanza is one of them. One thing i can think of that might help, "Like a virus its spreads" rhymes with "eating away at every connecting thread" but you might want to change the first line to "Like a virus it is spread" because "its spreads" is grammatically incorrect... otherwise, good job!
    5/5
    *Chaotic Angel*

  • 16 years ago

    by Bianca The Queen Of Hearts

    Reminds me of me LOL great job!

  • 16 years ago

    by ForeverASickKid

    WOW!! i love it! its so powerful!

  • 16 years ago

    by 4EvErMaKeBeLiEvE

    I wish I could help with this one but right now there is a big emprty space in my head and heart.

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