Comments : Enduring the pain

  • 16 years ago

    by xxxStarSxxx

    "Leave me alone for now I grieve
    Every time I think of you..." This sounds like a run-on sentence split randomly. It would flow better if you started the second line with "I greive" instead of ending the first line with it.

  • 16 years ago

    by Kimberley

    Nice write. i got lost in the emotion. it is so heartfelt and sad. KM