I found this poem interesting to read. However, I didn't think that the repitition really worked here. If you want to restate the 'I have a wire face' bit, then I would sugust putting it at the beginning and the end, and having that be it, so that it reads like this: |
by lonelynow
That's something to think about. I actually like your version a lot, but never thought about doing anything like that myself. Thank you very much for the help! |
by lonelynow
Although if I were to change it, it would probably be to something like this: |