Once Upon a Dream

Once upon a dream, I believed in you,
Hell, I believed in us; I believed in myself,
But like all dreams I've stumbled through,
I never come out smiling, ever.
And this time I can say it is all because of you,
Put the blame on all the sh!t you put us through.

Like a tightrope fastening around your throat,
You're suffocating as you reach for your coat,
Passing me a sympathetic smile through gritted teeth,
All the while keeping a watchful eye on me.
I'm ready to snap and you can feel it in my stare,
But you don't say good-bye, you wouldn't dare.
And tomorrow I'll paint myself a braver face,
Lie and tell our old friends you took your space.
[I doubt they know the difference in going and gone, anyways.]
Today, I stared at myself in disbelief,
How in the world could I let you get the best of me?
It was just four years, no big deal right?
I'm sure I can get through this alright.

You would laugh in my face if I said I needed you,
Just so you could say "I told you so!"
And keeping that in mind, doesn't make it any easier,
Sitting here by the phone, etching out your number.
And I just wish for once you would call,
With more than an itching for an argument.
[But the clock is flushing that dream down the toilet.]
The more I sit here thinking of the time I wasted,
The more I want to beat your heart like you did mine,
I should have listened when they told me not to trust you,
I never should have gone all out to impress you.
Now I don't even know who I am anymore,
But once upon a dream, I did know who you were,
[Now I know why they say dreams never come true.]

-Jenna.Elphick
September 21, 2008