We'll forget

by LockedInEternity   Sep 24, 2008


When you mess up, ill still be here
waiting around to wipe each tear.
A few wrong turns, but I'll forget
Being with you, I can't regret.

When we mess up, it's still alright
it may take many sleepless nights.
Some more wrong turns, but we'll forget.
A stronger friendship, no regrets.

Engulfed in lies, deceit, and hope
so you don't fall, I'll help you cope.
You may turn left, while I go straight
but we'll get driven back by fate.

Imperfection saves us all
without mistakes, we'd never fall.
How can we feel, if we can't hurt?
Can't break or fix, only divert.

One of us fails, while the other succeeds.
While you dab, my wounds cease to bleed.
While we're both here, why not embrace
the hopeless errors we have faced.

Sometimes I lose the well known scent
that you, unknowingly, had lent.
You're someone that I can't forget.
I knew that when we first had met.

A fault away from losing you,
Happened so smooth, I all but knew.
I lost a scent, I severely want back.
The more you fade, the further I lack.

When you mess up, I'll still be here
waiting around to wipe each tear.
Now I messed up, but you're away
without your help, my tears still stray.

A world so heavy screams so loud.
You're silver lining on my cloud.
Can I attempt? Try to repair?
A friendship I still wish was there.

** please don't forget to vote, thank you**
xox

    report violation
0


Did You Like This Poem?

Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by BREEawNUHH

    Aw. This is wonderful. A beautiful dedication to your friend. Even though at the end you said that the friendship is gone, I still thought it was as great as it could have been. Your word choice was nothing short of perfect.

    The only problem I found was..

    "When you mess up, ill still be here
    waiting around to wipe each tear.
    A few wrong turns, but I'll forget
    Being with you, I can't regret."

    -- In the first line, "ill" should be "I'll".

    I noticed nothing else that needed to be changed in any way.

    Five out of five. [5/5]

    ``Briana

  • 16 years ago

    by The Queen

    One thing I dint like here was the repetition of wipe each tear otherwise it could have been incredibly awesome to me. Some of the words were forced just to go with the rhyme thing. These are just the flaws I can see in this piece other than that, the way how you constructed it was great and somehow easy to read probably coz the sentences were not that long. Plus I liked the vivid image this piece was conveying. On this piece you manage to focus on just one image all throughout the poem. God Job.

  • 16 years ago

    by ledane

    Felt the need and wantin in that....great poem.. but with pure honesty igot lost a little on the flow..

    "unkowgingly, to me had lent" would have sounded better to me and on last stanza i prolly would have said "i wish was still there" just sounds a more flowy to me... but again, i just write and not edit or deliberate...thanks...hook me up with another review...i am 5/5 on this one just for the theme...powerful

  • 16 years ago

    by Krista

    Very interesting. i really liked it. way to go.
    keep it up.

  • 16 years ago

    by Paiger

    Wow, again amazing, phenominal and awesome :) I have never felt so much from someones poetry, extremly amazing :)

    "Engulfed in lies, deceit, and hope
    so you don't fall, I'll help you cope.
    You may turn left, while I go straight
    but we'll get driven back by fate."

    I espeshily liked ^this stanza, it really touched me, I love to think that there are some people that you will always be drawn back to, for good reason :)

Read All Comments (5)

More Poems By LockedInEternity