Disappearing lust

by Kaila   Sep 27, 2008


Rain beats down hard, enveloping my body with every drop,
My vision blurred, elongated raindrops suspend on my lashes.
Ruby lips turn plum as the icy air grazes over my porcelain face.
Sliding feet fall out of my shoes as the puddles take control.

Perturbed eyes stare anxiously at the meadow before me.
Flowers loud in the gray grass; then I see him, waiting.
How I wish the rain would evaporate his clothing,
I believe then his skin would jump to me in thirst.

Eyes stare past my exterior, straight into my saddened soul,
Each step towards each other erupts more yearning.
Both clouds of breath almost touch creating a cloud.
Then we are there, noses only inches away from the others.

Our eyes are burning with drive, to touch the others cheek,
His hands tangle in my soaking hair, I blush a deep red.
Then in the corner of my eye she appears, ravishing as always.
His hands left me, with one yearning stare he vanished.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by SilentSuicide

    Wow. your detail is amazing. i can get a clear vision of what your saying. very well done. deff. a favorate<3

  • 16 years ago

    by Austin

    I agree with Zeenat. It was done very well, and from the title on it was interesting. You kept a constant vision throughout which, in my opinion, keeps the reader interested. The end was sad, but I liked it for sure. Again, not much to say, it was another good piece of work. Well done.

  • 16 years ago

    by Brittany C

    I really liked this poem. I can relate to it. You used strong words in the right way. The format is great and the poems is just the right length. I give it a 5/5 because I see nothing wrong with it.

  • 16 years ago

    by Hollymariee

    I like the picture . Alot of big words , it really describes both strong feelings and the scene perfectly . I have nothing bad to say , each line flowed beautifully into the other .. And everyone almost can relate to this . Amazing job , 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Beautiful Forever

    This was beautifully written. The flow, the concept, the word usage... all very good. I really enjoyed reading this... Although the lines were long, the flow never wavered and that's an accomplishment that I respect. 5/5

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