Agony

I sit here with thoughts that haunt and torture me
The sadness of it all surrounding my soul in agony
The dreams that come like a ghost unwanted
Pierce my head fiercely causing my brain to be haunted
I grab my head and squeeze with all my might
Trying desperately not to scream in the silence of night
With tears that burn all the way down my face
Alone and abandoned in this horrible place
If I cant be with you then I'd want to be free
Instead of the memories of you keeping me company
Because the thoughts of not having you are killing me inside
The only hope I have is that one day you'd be mine
But that run-in I had with you not too long ago
Has proved to me you found someone and let me go
So what am I to do with thoughts of you haunting me
Will I forever suffer in this world internally
In my dream last night you kissed me and said "I love you"
And when I woke up in bed I realized none of it was true
I laid there and cried and felt so empty inside
And tried hard not to think of the times you slept by my side
Alone, emotional, unwanted and ignored
These thoughts, this life i truly abhor