Who is this guy? dedicated to someone i suddenly love

by dremermels   Oct 8, 2008


Who's this guy starting to captivate my heart?
he is someone I cannot dare to be apart
Who's this guy wanting to change my fate?
I cannot help but just have faith

May I know this guy conquering my brain?
I cannot decide to follow the right train.
May I know this person who's truly hurting,
It's like a strike to bone pain!

This guy is someone I miss each day
Someone I wish I could hold on in this journey
Hoping I'll be given more days
To show and express this undying feelings.

Can I be with this guy who is truly holding my heart?
It seems so easy but it's just so hard!
Can I follow the shout of my soul?
To fight destiny and contradict people?

Who is this very unsensitive person?
Hurting me through his painful actions.
But my heart is always ready to ignore
For this feeling has brought me so much joy.

Will this guy feel the same?
And someday fight for me without shame?
I don't care if he won't
For I'm willing to smile another life's pain.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    "I cannot help but just had faith"

    had should be have.

    "May I know this guy conquerring my brain?"

    There is only one "r" in conquering.

    "This is guy is someone I miss each day"

    Delete the "is" before "guy", it will make more sense when you read it.

    "To show and express this undying feelings."

    I love this line, very sweet. "this" should be "these".

    "Can I be with this guy who is truly holding my heart?
    It seems so easy but it's just so hard!
    Can I follow the shout of my soul?
    To fight destiny and contradict people?"

    I liked your wording here, you express yourself very well, and this is a very deep and meaningful poem, nice job.

    "Will this guy feel the same?
    And someday fight for me without shame?
    I don't care if he won't
    For I'm willing to smile another life's pain."

    Good ending, nice questions tagged on in some of the lines, I liked that! :) My advice would be though, to just go back and correct the mistakes I pointed out, other than that this was a great love poem. Keep writing, always and forever....

  • 16 years ago

    by dremermels

    PLEASE SUPPORT..

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