Wow that was so sad yet so true. You described the feeling of giving your love and being used in return. So many girls are going to be able to relate to your poem and appreciate it. 5/5

Throwing away her innocence
on a single whim of true love.

Very true words.
The poem has some mistakes,like inside and not in side .Thinking that she HAD done something wrong,and fell,not feel...

I liked the whole,I think the 3rd stanza is a bit off though..keep it up!

This was well written, a few problems with the flow but nothing major. It was true and meaningful and i liked that.
You did a good job on this one.
Tara-Kay
x

Well .. This poem is really just a sentences seperated .. Theres nothing really artsy about it . There's no flow , no rhymes .. No image created , so that's whats going on . Try adding rhyming it , or make sure all the sentences have the same number of syllables . The idea is in the right place though .

Eh, well.. the structure of the poem was odd to say the least.. there were no real stanzas or anything. The flow .. there wasn't even one. :| Which didn't really make the poem that easy to read. I agree with Holly, some rhyming would help with the flow of the poem. Other than that, I think if you had a flow the thoughts and emotions in this poem would flow more smoothly and make the poem more interesting. Maybe also try to jazz your words up a bit, I find them to be kind of plain. 4/5.

I dont understand..not there for sex the feelings werent there....i think the only reason a man should have sex with any women is b/c the feelings are there im sorry.

again with the emotion i also see you dont use a lot of metaphors or simili's in your poetry your kinda straight forword. other then that
-Raindrops 5/5

This well written poem seems to reflect a feeling of rejection

I liked the concept and feeling to this one. The word usage was good too. Again, a little vague and could be more poetic. But it's still keeping up with the concept to poetry and holding the reader. Good write!

This is a very sad poem. I didn't enjoy reading about it...:( I liked the poem itself, I just don't like the depressing love stories :( we all live them from time to time.

I think that this poem is really an interesting one, I can tell that the structure and the syllables are not at all lining up and are way off kilter.

There is something that this poem has that many others do not. It's pure and raw emotion. It's easy to fake a lot of things when writing, but emotion is the hardest of all.

I gave this 5/5 because it was pure raw emotion.

I really liked it.

5/5

"The darkness is still
there inside her heart.
When she remembers the way
she gave herself to that boy
hoping that he would feel the same."

Oohhh boy...how many girls can relate to this?! Now I'm not sure if this piece is allowing someone into your heart and loving them only for them to walk away if you're hinting at throwing away her virginity...either way the sadness in this piece is beautifully written, there's so much emotion right from the opening lines.

"Throwing away her innocence
on a single whim.
She loved him so much
but he turned her away.

The feelings just were not there
so he walked away
leaving her alone, helpless
with a shattered heart."

^^ Again I wonder how many relate to this...
The heartache of giving someone you're all only for them to throw it back at you and walk away leaving you with nothing is unbearable and hurts so much and you capture this very well in these two stanzas.

"Thinking that she had
done something wrong.
She fell into the,
cold darkness of her mind. "

^^ I like this closing, I find it to be very sad, filled with so much heartache and void of all hope, left only with despair and that makes for a powerful closing.

Beautiful writing on this one.

I really like the idea of this poem.
its an issue that many girls face.
and im sure, many guys would have to deal with this issue also.

i agree with other people, perhaps you could incorporate some more poetic devices in this poem.

but, it is still very good.
keep writing :)

Very well done. I can relate. Not too bad. I enjoyed the read 4/5

She fell into the,
cold darkness of her mind.

That comma shouldn't be there .. It just really makes no sense . I think some of your poems are too short , and should be elaborated on .. And some of them could even be merged together . 4/5 on this one .

Fantastic.. You have used such good language.."
Carry on writing!